My sister steps onto new territory on the 23rd of december, when she reports to her new secondary school. No surprises there, she's most likely going to mgs, where most of her friends are going(:

So exciting! I remember my first day at mgs, meeting new people and new friends(: from various schools, as the mg primary girls mostly were in other classes(:

Anw I must really be getting old, I keep reminising about the past instead of looking towards the future.

Church was pretty christmassy today, singing Christmas songs, having the infant baptism, where little babies get water on their heads and they respond by turning their heads and crying or burying their heads in the parents' chest. The sermon was pretty interesting despite being on the same topic that i've heard for the past 21 years of my life- it was about the birth of Jesus christ and what it means.

Jesus christ came down to earth in a manger, lying as a baby in a barn filled with all the animal smells. The horses and the pigs and the ducks and the goats. Oh the lack of hygiene! I'm amazed that Mary didn't die of some horrible post-partum infection (well she could have given birth in the inn and then went to the barn with Jesus but still..).

With regards to the meaning of jesus' birth, I loved how the pastor phrased it, God came down for:
1. Salvation - from the sins of life
2. Strength - for us to endure the demands of life
3. Peace - to bring us peace admist the adversities of life
4. Hope - for the future of our lives

Yup. Rather amazing evangelical message that did more for me compared to other years(:

Had teochew porridge buffet at hotel winsor for lunch. Good and cheap. But porridge isn't really my thing, old people food hahaha.

Okay onwards to raving rabbids. I want to get mario galaxy! Do they have wii in the paeds wards? If they do I will confirm pwn the kids. Evil laugh.

-Cheryl~*


Heh. That's my mums omnomnom face(:

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its finally the end of the LONGEST year ever, school-wise at least.

3 major postings - med, surg, ortho. all MUST pass postings.. finally over.
24 weeks of clinics.. looking back it didnt seem very long, ortho seemed to pass by in a flash, thanks to a couple of end year birthday parties, and soon it was the end of posting test, and that finally all ended today.

there are a couple of movies i wanted to catch, and games i want to buy for my wii, and how i should start clearing my table, throwing out some clothes and buying more! :)
i just noticed that i do have many bags, some of which i havent used in a while. WHY! they are so pretty! shall find more occasions to use them.

had a magnificent lunch at soprano, this italian pizza/pasta restaurant at portsdown road, a sister joint to the one our CG had dinner at on my birthday :) this rather interesting coincidence was noticed by jiayan who found the menu identical to caipirinha at greenwood avenue.

food was great, i still find the servings small though. but the food was fantastic. had this absolutely mushroomy creamy mushroomy creamy mushroomy creamy pasta which was filled with mushroomy creamy stuffing. very sinful but very very amazing. i actually really liked the food. i got home and i was hungrygowhere-ing and the reviews were strangely awful for soprano. strange, i thought the food compared well with caipirinha. in fact, i think the ambience for soprano is much much nicer :):)

sometimes, great food, awaits discovery. i will definitely go back there. but a much nearer choice is probably galbiati at railway mall. awesome italian food, reasonable price. :)

well to each his own i guess.

we were all stuck at the restaurant cos it started to pour buckets, after footing the bill, i decided to join jiayan for some carolling at this home for the intellectually disabled in bishan. its really been a while since i last gave something back to the community, i really do enjoy doing these things, but sometimes life gets all overwhelming, and i cant commit.

it isnt my first time dealing with the intellectually disabled. i used to teach drama and social skills fortnightly to intellectually disabled children at cairnhill cc. some of them had down's, some were autistic, but yet, all were wonderful. sometimes i love how innocent these people are, how pure, and unpolluted.

when i was teaching them social skills, i recall one of the lessons was to get all of them to hold hands in a circle. something so easily achieved, was such a challenge for some of them. there was this little 4 year old boy who only wanted to hold my hand, and refused to hold anybody else. he was autistic, but he was such a beautiful boy. he wouldnt talk, but he communicated thru a tug on my jeans, squeezing my hand and with his eyes. this boy has a form of autism, and his parents only discovered his condition when he didnt start talking at all and was exceedingly introverted compared to other children his age. he looked completely normal, but yet so different from other boys. his mom would always style his hair, making a centre spike (like beckham - this was when i was in secondary school) and he would always wear the nicest clothes. (just like a child model - you know like gap kids!?)

i must say, im just so intrigued with how the minds of these children work. the touch of a stranger could bring them into a fit of crying and screaming. the way they quietly watch from afar and observe their peers instead of joining in. how i've never heard some of their voices. and how you can never understand how they perceive things.

i once did a drama piece on this book "the curious incident of the dog in the night time - by mark haddon". a tale of an autistic boy and how he finds his neighbour's dog stabbed with a pitchfork, and how he goes on an adventure to find his mother (his parents divorced) in london, after finding out his dad did the horrible act. for one such as him to explore unchartered territory, to find his mother just from an address and going about doing things his way, and how he double 2's for comfort. is just compelling and amazing. that book is highly recommended.

ah all this pointless rambling.

this lady at the christmas party at the home gave me a hug and thanked me for coming to the home. and that was my highlight of the day. i didnt really feel the event was well-planned and i also felt that the organizers over-estimated the intellect of the clients of the home, but it all didnt matter. what mattered most, i believe was just our presence. it was the company, the singing, the joy they got from shaking a visitor's hand, and asking your name, and us wishing them merry christmas.

i do however find them a bit more challenging to handle than children with intellectual disabilities. the clients at the home have the strength of a grown man but the mind of a child, and sometimes they dont understand their own strength. my hand was almost crushed by one of the clients. thankfully it was almost. and he did it because he wanted me to pick up a score sheet left on the stage by another caroler. so helpful, but so painful for my hand. but nonetheless, the visit was much more of a blessing than anything i could have planned in the afternoon.

what a great way to end the academic year.

-cheryl~*  

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i cant believe 3/6 of the ortho OSCA was on paediatric conditions. i mean hello!? i know orthopaedics has a "paed" in it. but omg. this takes the dislike for kids to another level. i mean yes its my fault i didnt study much on paediatric ortho (i totally forgot) but freaking evil can. past years dont have so many freaking paediatric conditions.

kids are just so disgusting. (disclaimer - this really has nothing to do with the OSCA)

there was once during one of my GP classes, sharon phua posted us a question. when a mother saves her child from a burning building, can you call it as a true act of courage motivated by motherly love for her child? or is it more of an evolutionary instinct, cos the child contains her blood-line and must be saved to pass on her genes. of course, 99% of girls wish to become mothers, and they will tell stand on their chairs, tear their shirts and shout, "BLASPHEMY" and declare war on the person who made the second statement. On the other hand, i did consider both sides of the argument and i felt that an evolutionary instinct could be probable too. i mean motherly love is something so abstract and it could be actually an evolutionary instinct to save the gene pool and thats why a mother treats her child with such tender loving kindness. but then again, what say those single mothers who abuse their children? so maybe not really evolutionary instinct after all, since there are mothers who abuse their children - damaging the carriers of their genes.. okay i digress.

for now, i'll just address this question that most of my girlfriends post to me. MULTIPLE times. do you want children in the future? this is probably one of the most important things you must clarify with the other party before you get married. my answer? i find children and babies absolutely repulsive. rather strong term, but let me tell you, i dont have the patience to answer stupid questions like "why is the sky blue" and having to comfort a kid who cries for no apparent reason or does something stupid like play with knives. HOWEVER, that does not mean i will not have children if the need arises. Let's say its the end of the world, and im the only woman left to give birth and carry on the human race. i'll probably ask them to develop the freaking baby in a jar and leave me alone. hahaha. okay im joking.

thing is, if i ever get married.. and my husband/in-laws absolutely insist on carrying on the gene line, i probably will still get pregnant and give birth. epidural injections are a must. according to many experienced mothers, giving birth is the easy part. its the next 25 years of horror and heartbreak that is difficult. its really whether or not you think you'll be a good mother, and how you bring up the child that is important. i think ppl who ask me this question dont really think about raising the child, more of just having cute babies with chubby cheeks to pinch and watching them try to walk and totter around.

the main reason why i dont want to have kids, is cos i dont think i'll make a good mother, and i dont want to "cane" my children and make them do their assessment books and go for tuition classes, i dont want to force my children to excel and compete against their peers, and eventually through all this hard training, give my children a poor interpretation of a mother's love. its the difficulty in differentiating what you are doing for your ego as a parent, and what you are doing for the child, that puts me off. some ppl will definitely be good mothers, and those ppl should have kids. im not sure if i have the capabilities to teach a child, and be a good role model, and im just not prepared to have a mini-me following me around for the next 25 years. so there, thats my reason. so its not just cos i hate kids, i mean if i have my own children i'll probably love them much much. its just my side of the bargain.

anw enough of the serious talk, onwards to kid-dissing.
i do still find kids repulsive. i think im going to DIE in paeds posting.
the kids behind my house are really not helping my general impression of these mini-aliens who cry, run around and break things. im still hatching a plan to put a manufacturing defect in their trampoline, so one day they will jump jump jump and then "oof", cry damn loudly cos got humeral fracture. or wait, how about a epiphyseal plate fracture! argh. i kena tricked by that one. sneaky man. sneaky.

the ang mor kids staying in a RENTAL house behind mine are so retarded. (note the rental, cos even though they are tenants they think they own the neighbourhood and that everyone loves listening to their kids from 7-9 am every morning and 4-7 pm every evening.) regarding the kids, retarded. absolutely. (like 200x more retarded than normal chinese children.) can you imagine a divergent squint (eyes in 2 different directions) and drool coming out of the side of their mouths, and like a slight tilting of the head and the kids whacking themselves on their heads cos they are.. STUPID.

well, cant expect much from a boy who screams like a girl, and pretends to be a dog. wait.. dog and girl --> bitch. ahahaha. and the stupid thing is he ALWAYS cries and wails like a baby when he trips over his stupid legs and falls while trying to catch his sister. guess the age of this retard? 5 years. like hello grow some testicles boy. i have a suspicion he has agenesis of his man parts.

okay i must stop being mean to this boy. i mean what if he really has agenesis of his man parts. its like damn sad for him la! im feeling a bit more sympathetic to his moronic actions.

NOT.

those kids should be caged. and i am really going to do something about that trampoline.

-cheryl~*

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the colour purple seems to be growing on me.
so is fat.
the scariest thing in life, is change that occurs so insidiously that you dont notice. until its too late.

i recall a time when i had no problem with weight, when i was skinny no matter what i ate, when i didnt have spare tyres around my waist. the only spare tire i own should be the one in my car. a spare tyre, literally. i didnt have that much of a voracious appetite either. nowadays, i eat as if i dont care. as if nothing matters as long as the mechanoreceptors in my tummy are fulfilled - ie. stuffed-full. and i dont really think about how cake will go to my thighs, or how not chewing more than 10 times will cause me to grow fat, or how having a sweet tooth is the greatest sin any girl can commit.

its scary, i cant believe im approximately 10 kg heavier than what i was in sec 4. how much bulk can one add in 5 years? and the bulk is going to all the wrong places.

how to confess when you look like a burger?
no guy will bat an eyelid at a fatty. no wonder you treated me like i was invisible, even though i was 2 persons away from you in queue.

and its no use saying im not fat or flabby, when the numbers show it.

<-- stop deluding yourself. FAT IS NOT BEAUTY.

a diet is in order.
starting tomorrow.
im still contemplating exercise. will start with sit-ups and crunches today.

-cheryl~*

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